A great activity for everyone

Never Have I Ever

A Hilarious and Revelatory Icebreaker Game: 'Never Have I Ever'—Where Players Compete to Share Fun & Shocking Experiences Yet Unhad!

Never Have I Ever
By Jon Zajac

What is Never Have I Ever?

The “Never Have I Ever” icebreaker game is a fun and interactive way to get to know others better by sharing unique experiences. The purpose of this activity is to encourage participants to reveal something they haven’t done, while the rest of the group indicates if they have through the show of fingers. Each player starts with ten fingers up, dropping one when they have done what the speaker has not. This game creates an engaging atmosphere that helps build connections between players and can lead to humorous moments. The ultimate goal is to be the last person with remaining fingers, which often involves making statements about experiences that are both popular yet new to you. Overall, “Never Have I Ever” is a simple yet effective way to strengthen bonds among participants while learning more about their peers’ lives.

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Rules for Never Have I Ever

  1. Everyone sits in a circle.
  2. Each player starts with ten fingers showing, placed on the floor.
  3. Go around the circle, one at a time, each person announces something that they have never done, beginning the sentence with the phrase “Never have I ever…”
  4. All the other players drop a finger if they have done that statement.
  5. The goal is to stay in the game the longest (to be the last person with fingers remaining).
  6. Saying statements that most people have done, but you haven’t, is a good strategy to win.
  7. Players can say silly statements to make the game more humorous.

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Materials needed for Never Have I Ever

  • Hands: Each player will need to use their hands to hold up fingers and drop them as they admit to having done something that has been said by another player.
  • People: A group of people is needed to play this game. Ideally, ten to fifteen players form the best circle for playing, but any sized group can participate by dividing into smaller groups.
  • Space: This game requires enough space for a circle to be formed, either sitting on chairs or on the floor. If there are many small circles playing, make sure each has enough room.

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Setting up for Never Have I Ever

To set up for the “Never Have I Ever” icebreaker game, follow these steps:

  1. Find a suitable location: Choose an indoor or outdoor space where everyone can sit in a circle. Make sure there is enough room for people to extend their arms and place their fingers on the floor.
  2. Arrange seating: Ask participants to sit in a circle, either on chairs, the floor, or any available seating. If you have an extremely large group, divide people into smaller circles of about ten to fifteen individuals each.
  3. Explain the rules: Clearly communicate the game’s instructions to all participants. Emphasize that everyone should start with ten fingers up and place them on the floor as the game begins.

Remember, no special materials are required for this activity!

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How to play Never Have I Ever

  1. Gather Players in a Circle: I gather all the players in a circle, either indoors or outdoors. If the group is extremely large, I divide it into smaller circles of about ten to fifteen people each.
  2. Each Player Holds Out Ten Fingers: Before starting the game, I instruct everyone to hold out all their fingers and place them on the floor. Each player should have ten fingers held out at the beginning of each round.
  3. Player Makes a Statement Beginning with “Never Have I Ever”: One player starts by making a statement about something they haven’t done, beginning with the phrase “Never have I ever…” For example, “Never have I ever been to Europe.”
  4. Other Players Drop a Finger if They’ve Done the Statement: After the initial statement, all other players drop a finger if they have done that particular thing. Using the example above, if three other people have been to Europe, they must put down a finger, leaving them with nine fingers remaining.
  5. Continue Around the Circle: We continue going around the circle, taking turns making statements and dropping fingers accordingly.
  6. Last Player with Fingers Wins: The goal is to stay in the game the longest by being the last player with fingers remaining. A good strategy is to say statements that most people have done, but you haven’t.
  7. Encourage Fun and Silly Statements: In addition to more serious statements, I encourage players to make funny or lighthearted statements like “Never have I ever skipped a class in school” or “Never have I ever soiled my pants.” This helps keep the game entertaining and enjoyable for everyone involved.

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Benefits of Never Have I Ever

  • Benefit: Encourages communication and socialization. By sharing personal experiences and listening to others, players can improve their conversational skills and build connections with one another.
  • Benefit: Promotes self-awareness and self-reflection. Players may discover new things about themselves as they consider which “Never have I ever” statements apply to them, leading to increased self-understanding.
  • Benefit: Provides entertainment and enjoyment. The game’s lighthearted and sometimes humorous nature can create a fun and engaging atmosphere, making it a great activity for social gatherings or team building events.
  • Benefit: Fosters empathy and understanding. By learning about the unique experiences of others, players can develop greater empathy and appreciation for different perspectives.
  • Benefit: Improves active listening skills. Players must pay close attention to each statement in order to accurately drop the correct number of fingers, which can help improve their overall listening abilities.
  • Benefit: Can be easily customized and adapted. The game can be tailored to suit different age groups, settings, and group sizes, making it a versatile and flexible icebreaker option.

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Skills built with Never Have I Ever

  • Communication skills: Players take turns speaking in front of the group, announcing something they have never done using the phrase “Never have I ever.” This helps build confidence in public speaking and active listening skills as players pay attention to each other’s statements and respond by dropping a finger if they have done that statement.
  • Self-awareness: By sharing personal experiences and reflecting on what they have and haven’t done, players can gain a better understanding of themselves and their own habits, interests, and values.
  • Empathy and Cultural Awareness: As players share their unique experiences, it can lead to conversations about different backgrounds, cultures, and perspectives, fostering empathy and cross-cultural understanding.
  • Critical Thinking and Strategy: To win the game, players need to think carefully about which statements to make, aiming for ones that most people have done but they haven’t. This requires strategic thinking and problem solving skills.
  • Social Skills: Playing “Never Have I Ever” encourages interaction and connection between players, helping them build relationships and establish rapport with one another. It can be a fun and engaging way to break the ice in a new group setting or deepen bonds within an existing group.

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Why I like Never Have I Ever

I enjoy playing the Never Have I Ever icebreaker because it is an engaging and interactive way to learn more about others. By sharing personal experiences and listening to the experiences of others, I can deepen my connections with the people around me. The game also encourages players to think creatively and come up with unique statements, which can lead to unexpected and entertaining conversations.

One aspect of the game that I find particularly appealing is the strategic element. By choosing statements that are likely to have been done by many other players, but not by myself, I can increase my chances of staying in the game longer. This requires me to pay attention to the group dynamic and make educated guesses about what experiences are common among the players.

Additionally, the game is flexible and can be adapted to fit a variety of settings and group sizes. Whether I am playing with a small group of friends or a large gathering of strangers, Never Have I Ever is a fun and inclusive way to break the ice and get to know people better. The simplicity of the game also means that it requires no special materials or preparation, making it a convenient choice for impromptu social gatherings.

Overall, I appreciate the Never Have I Ever icebreaker for its ability to foster connections, encourage creativity, and provide entertainment in a wide range of social situations.

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Tips for making Never Have I Ever more inclusive

  • Tip: Allow for varied experiences and identities Make sure to create an environment where all players feel comfortable sharing their unique experiences, regardless of their background or identity. Encourage statements that reflect diverse perspectives and avoid stereotypes.

  • Tip: Offer alternative ways to participate For individuals who may have difficulty putting down fingers (e.g., due to physical limitations), provide alternatives such as using a small object or keeping track of their fingers mentally. This ensures everyone can play without feeling left out.

  • Tip: Emphasize the fun and lighthearted nature While some statements might be more serious than others, always bring the focus back to having fun and learning about each other. Avoid creating a competitive atmosphere that could make some players feel uncomfortable or excluded.

  • Tip: Encourage self-reflection Prompt participants to think about their own experiences and share them openly. This can help create a stronger bond between players and promote inclusivity by highlighting shared experiences and understanding differences.

  • Tip: Be mindful of sensitive topics While playing the game, be aware that certain subjects may be uncomfortable or off-limits for some individuals. If a statement seems inappropriate or hurtful, gently steer the conversation towards a different topic to maintain a positive atmosphere.

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Reflection questions for Never Have I Ever

  1. What is one interesting fact you learned about someone else in the game? This question encourages players to reflect on the experiences and stories shared during the game, and highlights the goal of getting to know each other better.
  2. How did you decide what statements to make during your turns? This question can help facilitators understand the participants’ strategy-making process, and provide insight into how they perceive and interact with their peers.
  3. Did you find it challenging to come up with a statement that hadn’t been done by others? Why or why not? This question explores the game’s dynamics and encourages players to think about their uniqueness and similarities with others in the group.
  4. What was your favorite statement made during the game, and why? This question allows participants to share what they found entertaining or engaging, which can lead to further conversations and connections.
  5. Was there a moment when you felt uncomfortable sharing or listening to a statement? If so, how did you handle it? This question promotes self-awareness and emotional intelligence by addressing potential challenges that may arise during icebreaker activities, and provides an opportunity for discussing healthy communication strategies.
  6. How can we incorporate the things we learned about each other today in future interactions? This question encourages participants to think about how they can apply their newfound knowledge of one another to strengthen relationships and collaboration within the group.

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About the author

Jon Zajac

Jon Zajac

Founder & Chief Icebreaker

I started Icebreaker Spot because I truly believe that strong connections are the foundation of successful teams. I wanted to create a platform that would make it easy for people to find and share icebreakers and team building activities, empowering them to build trust, foster collaboration, and ultimately, achieve greatness together.

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